I've been sick for over a week now blog readers and it's driving me insane. I think its developed into a chest infection from a cold because all I'm really doing is trying to cough up a lung. Its not fun. The other day though after I'd sat around in my sickness the day before, I decided to get dressed and try and do something with my day because I'm trying this new thing where I get up, dress up and show up. You know instead of lying around whinging and I did feel better for it even if I didn't do anything in particular with my day in the end.
Then my mum brought home candy apples and I was struck with a familiar feeling that comes along every October except this year was a little different, it opened my eyes a little wider.
See I usually go around complaining that I hate the winter and I do really, I hate the wind and the rain and the coldness and if you had asked me up until this point yesterday I'd have said my favourite month was August and my season was Autumn. Now while my season is still Autumn, my month is now October.
This is because I realised that things happen in October and it's a season of change in the air and usually somewhere in my life. There is always that feeling that comes along and is like 'Hey it's October!', time to reminisce and eat candy apples and watch fireworks and change your life. It's a familiar and comforting thing and has been happening ever since I had my first kiss with my first love under the fireworks.
It's one of those things that you'll never forget, but now, I have a new love and new fireworks and our first kiss was on the same night but on a sofa and it's been weird because I was well aware that our anniversary was Halloween but it hasn't really sunk in until my body was like, 'Hey, it's October, Wake up!'. He told me that first night that he didn't want to kiss me under the fireworks because he knew about my first love. But now, I'm okay with it. I know my first love will always be in my heart and fireworks will always remind me of him first before anything else, but there has to come a point when I move on. It's taken me a few years to get here, but I'm here and I'm asking you (you know who you are and so does everyone else probably) this year, to kiss me under the fireworks. Just do it, don't think about it, or ask. I'm ready for this new but already familiar kiss. So I'll meet you there and maybe I'll wear the dress.
That's another thing about October, the change in the weather means I start wearing cute dresses with tights and hats and boots. I always thought I preferred summer fashion but now I definitely think Autumn fashion is much more me. I can see myself running around in my boots feeling like I can conquer the world. So all in all, I like October and Autumn and I'm here and while I'm still trying to kick this infection's ass, I'm ready for October, for candy apples and playing dress up and for the fireworks and for the kiss.
I'll be sure to let you know how it goes readers but until then, hopefully I'll have something else to say.
Until next time,